Secrets, Scars, and Tattoos
by Daisainan Neko
Summary: Zutara. Zuko's nightmares intrigue the waterbender, even though she still has a HUGE grudge against him. And what's with him always covering his arms? And when Katara discovers Zuko's strange tattoo, things get complicated fast.
1. Nightmares

**This little Zutara is set after The Firebending Masters and before The Boiling Rock, though I think some of it later will be set after The Boiling Rock adventure.**

**Oh and child abuse, including sexual and physical (though nothing explicit, I couldn't write that!), will be in this fic. If you can't handle that, turn back now. You have been warned! So don't say I didn't!**

'**Kay, cheerio now!**

XOXO

Ever since joining the Gaang, Katara had been openly giving Zuko dirty looks. He supposed he deserved it, but even Aang and Sokka had been making attempts at being on fairly friendly terms. She also made constant snide comments and said things that were just plain rude. Some would even make Aang gasp and Toph raise her eyebrows. Haru, Teo, and the Duke avoided Zuko for the most part. The Duke was absolutely terrified of Zuko; after all, he was the Firelord's son.

Toph already enjoyed joking and teasing with Zuko, his temper made it _so _easy to get a rise out of him. She would punch his shoulder and call him names until he snapped. Then she would just laugh. Zuko learned to try and ignore her when he discovered she did this to everyone. And it was good-natured, unlike with Azula, who would do it cruelly.

So far training Aang had been going all right. The encounter with the Sun Warriors had definitely been a big help. He was a fast learner, being the Avatar and all. He was a fairly cooperative pupil, although his optimism and cheerfulness got a little on Zuko's nerves. Katara didn't like Aang being alone with fire and Zuko, so she often threatened Zuko and hung around the training platform while they were training, concealed in bushes. Zuko knew she was there, of course. She wasn't exactly a master of stealth.

Meals with the Gaang were made less awkward due to the fact that Toph and Aang made efforts to include Zuko in conversation. He now slept in a sleeping bag around the fire with the rest of the Gaang. Katara was reluctant at first; probably thinking he would slaughter them in their sleep. But if he had really wanted to, he already had plenty of chances. But sleeping with the others had a disadvantage for Zuko. His dreams were often plagued by nightmares and traumatizing memories, and he wanted no one to find out. Toph was the only one awoken by this, though. Her hearing was better than the others' and she could feel the vibrations of him rolling and thrashing around. When this happened she would simply wake him and go back to sleep. Zuko was grateful she never mentioned it to him later or told the others. They didn't need to know.

After he was woken, Zuko would spend most of the remainder of the night staring into the burning embers of the fire, trying to clear his head enough to fall into a peaceful slumber. It never worked, and simply resulted in him becoming grumpier from lack of sleep.

"What is the matter with you?" Sokka asked one morning at breakfast.

"Nothing," Zuko grumbled.

"Seems to me you're not getting enough sleep," Aang commented, noticing the dark circle under the firebender's un-scarred eye.

"It's nothing, really."

Toph mercifully stayed out of the conversation. Katara, however, couldn't restrain herself.

"Aw, is your soft princely butt not used to sleeping on the ground?" she sneered. Aang looked shocked Katara _could_ sneer.

Zuko narrowed his eyes but didn't respond. There had been plenty of times his father had thrown him in the garden to sleep at night, angry at Zuko's rebellion during his punishments. But Zuko wasn't about to share that personal information.

That night, Zuko was awoken from his nightmares as usual. He found himself staring into the blue eyes of Katara. And Zuko's heart nearly failed.

XOXO

**So, how do you guys like it? The next chapters will be longer! I promise!**

**Love,**

Lady 


	2. Dirty Sins

**Rawr. I'm back! Thanks for all the reviews! FIRE FLAKES TO ALL OF YOU!**

XOXO

As soon as she saw Zuko's eyes snap open, Katara sat back from his sleeping bag. Zuko shot up into a sitting position, cold sweat from the nightmare coating him. He blushed as he realized he had gone to bed shirtless. Thank Agni he had kept the white bandages wrapped around his arms as usual. (LH: You know… the kind Sokka has wrapped on his arms. Zuko's go from his elbows to his wrists.) Katara was determined to not look any lower than his eyes as she spoke to him in a harsh tone,

"You were trashing and crying out like a little girl. Try to keep it under control, some of us are trying to sleep."

"Sorry…" Zuko knew better than to argue with the waterbender. But why hadn't Toph awoken him as usual? Zuko glanced around and realized Toph was sleeping spread-eagled on Appa's head. Probably to avoid being woken up by the vibrations Zuko sent through the ground every night. His mind snapped back to the situation at hand as he realized Katara was ranting to him.

"… and, honestly. What would you be having nightmares about? You were the prince of a nation close to dominating the world. Your life has been perfect! Do you have any idea what we went through this past year? What you put us through?" She was angry, her voice full of contempt. She crossed her arms across her chest. "Well?"

Zuko looked down and spoke softly, "My life hasn't been perfect. And I know yours hasn't been either. I understand, and I'm so sorry for what I did. It was wrong, and I know that now. I'll never be able to make it up to you all."

Katara completely ignored the apology and angrily continued her rant. "Not perfect? What, did Daddy put you on time out for shouting indoors once or something?"

Zuko stayed silent for a long time. When he finally spoke, he had to choke back tears. He didn't know why he was about to tell Katara this, but it wasn't like she could do anything with the information. And if it put her pestering to a stop… "My mother committed treason so my father would have to banish her, and would know the pain of losing someone without having to kill me, which was his original plan. I haven't seen her since."

Katara didn't respond. What Zuko had just said was so confusing, and even more so to her sleep-clogged brain. What? What was he talking about? His father was going to kill him… but instead his mother was banished… what the heck. That sounded pretty messed up. And really confusing.

"… What?" she asked after an excruciatingly long silence.

"I know it's difficult to understand. But that's the way the royal family has always been. So simple, so perfect on the outside, like ceramic. But on the inside… it's a web of confusion and dirty sins." Zuko winced after the last part; he hadn't meant to say that.

Katara looked at him sharply. "Dirty sins? What is that supposed to mean, Zuko?" she stared him down, daring him not to give her the answer she so badly wanted.

"… It wasn't supposed to mean anything. It was a metaphor," Zuko held his breath at his pathetically lame excuse. Stupid! Is that the best you can come up with on the spot? Come on, Sifu Hotman!

Wait, when had he started calling himself that?

"Well I don't believe you. You're an awful liar, and I'm not even Toph. You're not telling me everything," Katara gave him a look, but decided to respect his very _suspicious_ privacy. She stood up, stretching. "I'm going back to sleep. I didn't wake you up to talk, anyway. I woke you up so you would shut up."

She walked back to her own sleeping bag, and laid down without another look at Zuko. He sighed, but laid back down himself. To his surprise, he felt himself drifting off again.

…

Zuko's eyes popped open as he heard someone pad softly into his room. _No. _He curled into a ball, shaking violently. _No. No. No. No. No. _He kept chanting silently in his head, as though somehow this would stop what was about to come. The person in his room climbed onto his bed, and as Zuko peeked from between his eyelids, his fears were confirmed. It was father. Ozai reached up to caress Zuko's cheek, and the boy flinched, earning him a slap. Ozai shed his cloak onto the floor, and he had nothing underneath. Zuko's breath quickened in pace, his heart thudding and a whimper escaping his lips. His father began to pull down Zuko's pants, and he closed his eyes, trying to ignore the cold fingers touching his hips. He bit his lip to keep from crying out in fear as his pants were thrown onto the floor and his father leaned up to kiss him. Zuko didn't respond to it, but he knew better than to do something stupid like resist.

His father forced his shirt over his arms and head, and then stared down at Zuko's shamefully bare body. Zuko shivered under the lustful gaze. This was so wrong. This was his father, of his own flesh and gender. Zuko squeezed his eyes shut when Ozai yanked his head up by his ponytail, forcing Zuko to do shameful things in Ozai's nether-regions with his _face_. When Ozai was satisfied, he shoved Zuko back down on the mattress, and the boy knew that this was when the real torture began. His father pounded into his eleven-year-old body and tears streamed down Zuko's face. The only thing keeping him from screaming and alerting the entire palace was the fact that he was biting his lower lip so hard it bled. Oh, he felt as though he was going to split in half. For an insane moment he wished he would, because then he would be dead and everything would be over.

Zuko instead focused on the dribbling of blood from his lip. _Just concentrate on the_ _warm, wet blood dripping from your chin to your neck… just hold on long enough to feel the next drip… _It was the only thing Zuko had to anchor him to a bit of sanity in the awful, pain filled night. He kept his eyes closed so he wouldn't have to watch it happening, or see the look on his father's face. He was brought out of his concentration on the blood as Ozai began to beat Zuko in the ribcage. The pain increased tenfold and Zuko struggled to breathe. He was usually beat separately from the _violation_ though Ozai liked to combine the two tortures sometimes. As Ozai pulled out, Zuko realized that it was mercifully over. _For tonight._

Ozai suddenly grabbed Zuko's wrists and held them, inner arm up. Zuko's eyes opened wide in horror. His father gazed at the cuts and scars layered all down his inner forearms for a painfully long moment, before he burst out laughing. Zuko looked at his father in further dismay as Ozai so blatantly laughed at the sign of his son's inner pain. The pain that he had caused. Ozai dug his nails into the newer cuts, making Zuko yelp. He laughed again, got off the bed and slipped on his robe. He left without a backwards glance at his son. With his father finally gone, Zuko buried himself under the covers and cried his little heart out. The pain and violation… being laughed at… He couldn't bear it. His heart hurt so badly that it was almost physical.

…

Zuko bolted up, gasping. He was drenched in a cold sweat and shaking heavily. The sun was just beginning to rise. _Huh. I would have gotten up now anyway,_ _nightmares or not. _Everyone else was still sleeping, thank goodness.

A sudden ball of fur jumped on Zuko's head, letting out a chirrup. Well, not Momo. Zuko decided to put Katara in a good mood by making breakfast before anyone woke up. Momo stayed on his head the entire time.

XOXO

**There you have it, so review now! Ugh that nightmare made me sad to write… I hope you enjoyed it all. Computer was being a butt so I had to copy and paste. The end was rushed 'cause I'm supposed to be in bed… Love you guys!**


	3. Hired Prince-nappers

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own A:TLA. You can tell cuz Zutara isn't canon -.-**

**Thanks to all reviewers, favorite-ers, and followers! I am honored *bows a polite 15 degrees* Seriously guys, it's awesome.**

**Oh yes, sorry I'm late. I got lost on the path of life.**

**If any of you got that reference to a certain gray-haired guy in a certain anime, tell me in a review! That would be really cool!**

**DN, out!**

XxX

Well, breakfast had gone... interestingly, for lack of a better word. Zuko had walked all over the forest looking for eggs or... something. He knew that they all still had rations of rice from being at different towns, but something like fresh meat might bring up their spirits. So he had walked through the forest and when he saw a bird in her nest, an idea struck him. He inched closer to his "prey" and when he had the perfect angle, he fired. Literally. Fire shot from his fist and roasted the bird right there.

Instant breakfast!

"Not bad, Zuko," he congratulated himself, rubbing the back of his head with one hand while picking up the still-steaming bird by the feet with the other. He peered closer at it. What the hell is this? He'd never seen a koala-bird in person. The little thing was the size of a bird, but had a furry gray body with koala ears. It had a beak, bird legs, wings, and tail. Zuko shrugged before climbing the tree to retrieve the eggs. Then he headed back to camp.

Momo had stayed by him as he de-furred the thing and cut it up, and then cooked the eggs.

"YAAAAWWWWWN!" Sokka sat up, rubbing his eyes and stretching. "Good morning, world!" He shouted as his arms extended upwards.

"Good morning, buddy!" Aang said, petting Appa's head. "Toph... What's up with you sleeping on Appa?" Aang looked puzzled.

"He's fuzzy, that's why," Toph jumped down with ease and walked toward the group. Aang shrugged and followed.

"Whoooaaaa what is going on?" Sokka's jaw dropped over-exaggeratedly and he pointed at Zuko, who held all their breakfasts. "Katara... Zuko... you... I CAN'T HANDLE THIS CONSTANT CHANGE!" He dramatically fell over and Momo "bbbrrrrmm"-ed and flew over onto his head.

"Nice, Sparky," Toph thanked him as she accepted her bowl.

"Yeah, wow Zuko. It looks good!" Aang accepted his rice with a bow, which Zuko had made for him. Aang was a vegetarian, after all.

"Humph!" Katara snatched hers grumpily.

Zuko handed out the rest to Suki, The Duke, Teo, and Haru. They all ate in peace, Momo occasionally grabbing rice from Aang.

…

Zuko POV (woohoo!)

I walked awkwardly through the woods with Katara. Everyone was out collecting firewood or edible plants. Aang had urged Katara and I to go with each other for "bonding." Pssh.

I (awkwardly) coughed, "So…"

I was cut off as Katara's pointer finger flew right up to my lips.

"Hush," she commanded.

My brow furrowed.

"Look, I know you don't like me, but can I at least-"

"I said hush," she whispered. "Listen."

Her brow was furrowed as well, and I obediently perked up my ears in an effort to hear the noise she had. My eyes widened. On the light breeze (thankfully in our direction) I could hear voices… Gruff, manly voices.

Well it definitely wasn't Sokka.

Katara dashed behind a tree further up the path and I followed suit on my side of the path. I knew what she was planning. We had to get close enough to see what the heck these men (assumed gender) were doing here, near the Western Air Temple, but without THEM spotting US.

Yeah, stealth mode.

We continued to do the same until I spotted a flash of colored clothing and hid completely behind my tree, my heart about ready to break out of jail (a.k.a, my ribcage).

Katara peeked out, and I did the same. They were sitting for the moment, so we took the liberty to eavesdrop.

"Hmm… where do you think we'll find Prince Zuko?" One man asked.

They just happened to be talking about their plans out loud. How I do love plot convenience.

"Our latest spies said this area. Be patient."

Spies? SPIES?! How the hell did we miss that?!

"Both of you shut it. We'll keep moving in a few minutes," a third (and hopefully last) man announced.

My and Katara's eyes widened and we simultaneously dashed away so fast that dust clouds in the shape of us were left behind.

With our adrenaline we ran blindly down the steep slope in the woods, not even aware of how much noise we made as we crashed through the brush. After a minute or two we skidded to a halt near the edge of a large lake. I stared; there was a lake down here? I gasped to catch my breath, falling to my knees. I noticed Katara struggling to catch her breath as well. Though we both soon did so, my heart continued trying to escape my chest.

Katara turned to face me.

"Now… you dragged spies here? As if you weren't enough of an annoyance!" she grew angry in tone. She was always angry at me.

"How is it my fault?" my fiery-hot temper escalated. "I didn't hire them!"

"No, but you are the reason they're here!" she countered.

Good point… though I would never say that to her out loud.

"I don't want them here either," my head drooped.

Geez, couldn't we all just get a little break before the comet? Just a little one? Why is that always too much to ask?!

Both our heads suddenly snapped up, our eyes wide, as a voice spoke behind us.

"Aw, you don't want us here? My feelings are hurt," the male chuckled.

Creepy voices always seem to talk to you from behind, don't they?

XxX

**Remember, just for fun, tell me if you got that reference in a review! :)**


	4. Shield Her

**Two chapters in one night, since you all have been so patient!**

**I hope I'm forgiven, haha!**

…

Still Zuko POV

The fight was far from fair, three firebenders vs one firebender and one waterbender. As they tried to capture us, I struck my fist out, launching fire at one. He evaded but I jumped onto my hands, rotating my legs dance-like, spewing flames in a full circle. Katara used water from the lake to block herself from it. Two of the men blocked my fire with their own but one was too slow. His face was burned and he fell to the ground, yelling in agony. Katara noticeably grimaced at the burns but didn't let it distract her.

Katara and I faced the last two, water and fists raised. The two came at us fast, both firing fireballs with such speed it was hard to block or evade. Katara instantly raised the water around her into tentacles like an octopus and blocked. I hit the ground on my chest to avoid them and fired a strike at my opponent's feet. He jumped and I cursed, jumping back to my feet. That was when I realized with horror that the biggest brute was nowhere to be seen. I briefly registered pressure to my neck before I fell.

…

Katara POV

I glanced at the unconscious boy before continuing to block fire from two men now.

Curses, now I have to handle them. I thought I was on a roll until my water octopus tentacle missed and a fireball skimmed my back. I cried out and fell, trying my hardest to fight the pain and maintain my defense. It was useless and soon I felt pressure to my neck as well. My bending water fell down beside me, everything fading.

…

Still Katara POV

I was lying on my stomach on wood. Everything was rattling and shaking, which was annoying. Was this one of Sokka's pranks? Then the intense burning pain hit. I was reminded of the time we all met the Deserter and Aang had accidentally burnt my hand with careless firebending. But no, this was worse. It was much, much, worse.

I let out a groan and a cry. My entire back had to be up in flames! I moved but a cool hand laid itself on my head.

"No, don't move," the gentle male voice instructed.

He sounded familiar…

"Zuko?" I managed to say a word though my brain was over-run with pain.

"Yes."

"Where are we?"

The male gulped. This didn't seem good.

"We, um, well, uh… Promise you will stay calm and not move too much."

I grit my teeth, in too much pain to argue. "Yes, okay. Just tell me!"

"Wellwekindagotcapturedbyfirebendersandwe'reinacar riage."

It took me at least twenty seconds to figure out his guilty, rushed words, and when I did I snapped. My eyes flew open and found him sitting near me.

"What?!" I tried to shift into a sitting position but stopped when he held both hands out, palms facing me.

"Whoa, whoa, you promised not to get upset or move!" He looked a little panicked and… concerned?

I laid down on my side to face him, wincing. I took care to not let my back touch the wood.

"Explain," I ordered.

He scratched the back of his head nervously.

"Well, I'm surprised you don't remember. We fought them by the lake. There were three guys, all firebenders."

It all came back and I made a move to strangle him, but the pain that resulted caused me to grimace and lay back down. He was pressed against the wooden wall, terrified. I took advantage of the silence to look around. We were enclosed in a wooden box, and it was big enough for three people to move comfortably. I noticed for the first time (a little late, don't you think?) that we weren't bound in any way. They must be REALLY confident that we weren't about to escape or even come close to it any time soon.

That was also when the wave of nausea hit me. Turned out I had motion sickness for things on wheels…

"Zuko," I choked out. "Get back."

I only gave this small warning before I retched up half-digested eggs and rice in the corner farthest from us. Oh no… now I had to deal with awful pain on my back and awful pain in my stomach. I lay on my stomach and groaned, squeezing my eyes shut. To my horror, a tear slipped out. I heard a shuffling and fingers gently ran through my thick, soft, wavy, chocolate hair. To my surprise I let it happen. I was too sick to protest and it was rather soothing, as shameful as it was to say that about something Zuko did for me.

My breathing evened and I fell into a calm sleep. It would have been restless if it hadn't been for him.

…

Zuko POV

As stressed out as I was, I couldn't help but smile down at the girl. She was always so tough and invincible, at least to me recently. I definitely never thought I'd ever see her this way.

I felt my eyes soften as I gazed at the shadows her long lashes cast down her cheeks.

What was I doing?! I was getting soft! And I was feeling for this water tribe girl! No, no, no, not going to happen. I would limit myself to caretaking. She was sick and injured, along with me being all she had. I would shelter and shield her… at least until we got out of this mess. After that, it would all be normal.

I nodded firmly, as if to assist in convincing myself.

XxX

**Updates will be MUCH more frequent now that I have a computer in my house instead of just my phone. They'll be even more frequent if you review…**

**Cough/**

**Anyway, I hope that counted as fluffy :) Lol, I tried.**

**Next chapter: they get out of the carriage, but not by escaping.**


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